amuse_box | The Pirate AU Meme

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pirate au meme

The Pirate AU Meme - slightly extended

(Pirate AU Meme)

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1. Boarded: Your ship has been boarded, and as captain you've been captured! Better hope the other captain gives quarter. Alternatively, it's a nice warm day for a swim. That plank was made for walking.

2. Victory: You've captured another ship! You knew those extra cannons would come in handy. And let's hope they've got lots of swag! Where's the captain? Are you the decent sort, or are you going to rub their face in it for a bit?

3. Swab the decks: You're a cabin boy! It's a good thing you don't mind doing all the dirty work, right? Anyway, the captain's calling; better see what they want.

4. Marooned: For a bit there you'd thought you were in Davy's Jones' grip, but somehow you've washed ashore with the driftwood. As you stare dazedly up from the surf, you have questions. Where are you? And who's that already on the shore?

5. Buried Treasure: Sink me! You've really found the mother lode. . . but you're not the only one. Who gets to take the treasure back to their ship? Better make sure it's you.

6. Rum: Rum, everywhere.

7. Swordfight: It's that person you can't stand! And they've taken your most valuable possession, that one of a kind thing you just can't live without! Better get that trinket back before it and your nemesis are gone over the side forever. Let's hear some swashes buckling.

8. Mutiny: The tack is full of maggots and this drinking water may as well have come from the gutter. There's one person to blame for this, and you're here to make especially sure that they pay for it. The captain does always seem to take the best treasure before everybody else.

9. Kidnapping: Don't they look rather peaceful, innocent even, sleeping so soundly there with their fancy nightclothes and pillows. Brings a tear to your eye, it does. Better take them aboard and send for a ransom.

10. Take a Gamble: Gotta spend your loot somehow, but it must have been the rum that had you bettin' everything at once! You've lost to your hornswagglin' shipmate; what did you lose, and what will they make you do now?

11. Under the Sea: You are now a Mermaid/Merman! That sailor over there sure looks appealing; let's see if you can lure them in with your charms. Don't forget that they can't breathe under water! You do seem to always forget, don't you. . .

12. Enemy from the Deep: What was that? Did you feel that? An unseen enemy is about to take this ship swiftly to the bottom of the ocean. Giant squid, enormous whales, sea serpents . . . hope you make it.

13. The Doldrums: Can you say cabin fever? The sails haven't moved in weeks. You're about seeing if your mates can relieve this awful boredom. And hopefully find some food and water. Don't squabble over it, now.

14. The Brig: Something you did has gotten you imprisoned in the very depths of this ship. How long until you see your next meal? When you see who put you here again, you'll make them pay. Hold on, maybe there's someone else here too.

OR

Make up your own! Arrrrr!
meme by

tropospheres and

pandarosi

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Unfortunately for the Crimson Robbers, the ship they'd chartered in Nikeah was poorly equipped and not capable of maritime warfare, thus rendering them vulnerable to attack from pirates. How ironic. Mercenary thieves falling to the whims of their sea-faring counterparts.

As the leader, Edgar -- rather, Gerad -- was fixed with his own cell in the dank brig far away from the rest of his crew. Perhaps for the better. The separation allowed him the peace and quiet necessary to think of a plan in which his true identity would not come to light. The disguise was shoddy at best, helped by the fact that the Crimson Robbers weren't very perceptive (perhaps why they made thievery their chosen profession). It got him along this far...

With only the slight hope that the pirates would overlook his resemblance to the supposedly missing King of Figaro, he sat and waited for the Captain to come pass judgment.]

[It was a decent amount of plunder, barely a fraction of what they used to get before the world was torn to pieces, but a fair haul considering the scarcity of merchant ships nowadays. What she wasn't counting on was the band of thieves on board, a surprisingly familiar few faces among the lot of them. She's sure a few of the crooked noses she saw were her own handiwork. If they were here then maybe...]

[Faris let herself into his cell, sitting down on a barrel on the other side of the bars, getting a good look at the man on the other side.

Well, look what we've got here.

[Of all the jail cells, in all the towns, in all the world...

Edgar heard Faris' appearance far sooner than he actually saw it, and it wasn't because of the rusty squeak of the bars being slid open. The instant that familiar brogue reached his ears, his head snapped up and for the briefest of moments, relief flooded him. It faded with the realization that though he had served as benefactor to the captain when their roles were reversed and Faris was a prisoner of the Crimson Robbers gang, it did not mean the obligation to return the favor existed. Honor amongst thieves mattered not when they were dealing with pirates.]

Charmed.

[He hoped. At least enough to spare him.]

[Faris seemed pleased enough, though it was hard to tell if it was because of the plunder they just managed to get their hands on, or something else. Either way, she crossed her legs, speaking casually as if the person she wasn't talking to wasn't on the other side of some bars. At least Edgar made a much more amiable prisoner than Faris had.]

Didn't think I'd be runnin' into you again.

[Sitting near the cell was a small pile of Edgar's equipment that they had liberated from him, which Faris started toeing through with mild interest.]

I assure you, it wasn't intentional.

[Though it was a weak attempt to inject some humor into a potentially solemn situation (depending on if his captor was the type to forget acts of kindness or not), Edgar chortled anyway. No matter the outcome, he was sure he'd end up smiling.

He leaned against the bars, his posture suggesting laziness but still with some of the refinement that came as a result of a lifetime in a castle, and regarded Faris with a casual smirk. He espied the good captain going through his things out the corner of his eye but made no comment or effort to stop the rifling. Nothing of value to him in there anyway.

Except maybe that automatic crossbow with the Figarian engravings on its finish. Including the initials E.F.]

We mean your ship and crew no harm, captain. We were merely crossing over into South Figaro. You've my word: if you set us free, I can assure you will be handsomely rewarded once we reach our destination.

[Speaking of handsomely...

He squinted. No, that wasn't right -- couldn't have been right. And yet...

Something was off. Very off. Edgar had his suspicions...]

Handsomely rewarded? [She scoffed,] What kinda reward does a group of cut-purses have to offer?

[The automatic crossbow was quick to catch Faris' eye. There weren't many devices quite like it, and despite the obvious signs of wear, Faris guessed that it was an expensive piece of equipment.

Faris picked it up, checking the weight of the thing in her hands. She ran her fingers over curve of the crossbow, not yet spotting the engraving, or if she had, the initials didn't mean anything to her.]

Not a bad piece of equipment you've got h-

[She trailed off, looking up to see him looking at her. Was he staring?]

What're you lookin' at?

Ah, nothing. I apologize. I did not mean to stare. You remind me of someone, that is all.

[Staring, no. Closely looking Faris over for extended periods of time, yes. There was a difference, according to Edgar. Even after a year of undercover work, he was still quick to think on his feet.]

I assure you when the time comes, Captain, it will make sense. But I ask that you trust me when I say you can have your pick of nearly anything in the Kingdom of Figaro once I've safely made it to the castle.

[He grimaced slightly and hopefully unseen when Faris began inspecting his crossbow with an appreciative eye. If she wanted it, it was hers. He just hoped she wouldn't note its origin.]

So what do you say?

Yeah? Is that why you let me go so easily before?

[At the mention of Figaro she arched an eyebrow, giving him a long, hard look.]

Yeah, and all I'll end up with is a fistfull of sand.

[Running her hand down the shaft of one of the bolts that came with the weapon, she shook her head.]

Rumor is that the Figaro castle hasn't been seen since the day the world got ripped apart.

I let you go because there was no need for us to keep you.

[That was the truth. It was also layered with hope that Faris would reward his kindness with the simple favor of chartering a ship for him on the sly in Nikeah -- the very same ship the pirates took over.

In hindsight, it might not have been strategically wise to entrust such a task to someone that had stolen from his crew first. Naive, really, for him to think all thieves were like Locke. What he wouldn't pay to have that treasure hunter in the ship with them now, or at least heading out to investigate such rumors for him...]

That much is true. However, my crew and I have stumbled across some intel suggesting Figaro is somewhere...

[With a sigh that was both solemn and tired -- solemn because Faris was right, Figaro was lost somewhere beneath her sands for the past year, and tired because of everything -- he slouched some more.]

...and we intend to find her. And if we do not find her, you have my word -- I will offer you everything I have instead. Including my life.

[He met her gaze again.]

Do you agree to these terms, Captain?

[Okay, that she wasn't expecting from him. Surprised, Faris set the crossbow down again, propping her elbows against her knees as she considered his words carefully. The man had a lot of guts, to barter with Faris like he had any sort of control of the situation. Not only that, but the nature of what he was suggesting...]

What's it matter to a buncha thieves if Figaro is found again or not?

[You could practically see the gears turning in her head as she tried to figure it out.]

There's much easier targets than tryin' to find a lost castle, if you're lookin' for riches.

[In spite of himself, he offered Faris a half-cheeky, half-charming grin as he slipped a hand between the bars and beckoned the other over with the crook of his fingers. Normally such a gesture was more reserved for the dozens of women he hit on daily. Not for...androgynous seafarers.]

You look like you're more than capable of keeping a secret, mm? Because what I have to tell you will have to accompany you to the grave. Up for it?

[Hesitantly, she approached the bars. One would think that someone of her rank would make sure to keep a good distance between her and any of their captives, in case they wanted to reach out and try something, but she was confident enough that if anyone tried, they would surely be regretting it. Not only that, but even if someone got a hold of her, her men knew better than to barter for her life.]

Yeah? So what is it?

[Once she approached, Edgar leaned in closer, that incongruent smile still evident on his face, then whispered--]

I'm not really a thief.

[A silent pause as he stopped to inhale as Faris got near him. Just like last they met, the Captain had an...interesting scent about 'him', one that Edgar couldn't help noticing even if he didn't try.]

I'm the King of Figaro.

[At that, Faris jerked away, as if she had been hit, and it was all she could do not to repeat his ridiculous claim out loud. ]

What are you tryin' to pull?

[It was a dangerous claim to make, if it was true, admitting that you're royalty isn't exactly the best idea when you're surrounded by pirates and thieves. She spoke in a hushed voice, watching him carefully for any tricks.]

Everyone knows that the King of Figaro disappeared a year ago, along with his castle.

Good. That's what I want everyone to think. I am not pulling anything -- I am telling you the truth.

[He had to pause to keep himself from tacking on the customary "my dear."]

It's too long a story for me to divulge with these bars between us; and even if I told you, I doubt you'd believe me without some proof, no?

[About all he had for proof were his blond hair (currently dyed to a pale, ashy brown) and his baby blues. Oh, and the two-faced coin he held out between his thumb and index.]

[Narrowing her eyes, she snatched the coin from him, inspecting the two faces. The same on both sides- no wait, there were slight differences. Identical but different. Long hair on one of them, and a face that looked remarkably like the one in front of her. If he was lying, well, he was doing a damn good job of it.]

[Closing her hand around the coin,] So what's keeping me from holdin' you for ransom?

The fact that you're a decent and loving person?

[His tone was playful and even, despite the fact they were, literally, discussing his fate (in so many words). Returning home to Figaro and ensuring the safety of his people was his priority. As long as he was able to do that, nothing else mattered.]

[She snorted, taking a step away from his cell.]

You must be confusin' me with someone else.

[Pocketing the two-faced coin, Faris suddenly turned to stride out of the brig. There were definitely some things she needed to think about.]

Edited 2012-07-22 00:31 (UTC)

Am I?

[He reached back into his pocket. He withdrew a cord instead of another two-faced coin. Cord -- no, it was a pendant. The same one the thieves took from her when she'd been captured by them at their camp. The same one she was quite adamant about having returned to her.]

I told you I'd return this to you, my dear.

[It was dark and damp and barely visible in the brig, but he was winking.]

[That managed to catch her attention. Making a full 180, Faris took two steps back towards the cell.]

Give that back-

[It wasn't until then that she caught onto what he called her.]

"My dear"?

Ah ah ah.

[He swiftly stuffed the pendant back into his pocket out of her reach and winked at her with a knowing smile.]

This is my bargaining chip. I did promise to return this to you, but what good would that do me now?

[A soft hum escaped him afterward and he even rocked back and forth on his heels, tempting and teasing her with a reply, yet offering no such thing. Almost as if he didn't hear her counter.]

Edited 2012-07-22 04:35 (UTC)

[She glowered at him, closing her hand around the air where her pendant once hung.]

What's keepin' me from going in there and just takin' it back myself?

[He leaned his head closer to her, until just the bars separated them and just a murmur sounded like a shout between them.]

...because I know who you really are, and you know who I really am.

[A beat.]

Dearest.

[She felt heat creep up her face, not quite embarrassment, but indignant at someone finding her out.]

I dunno what the hell you're talkin' about.

Faris Scherwiz | Final Fantasy 5

14? IDK. Continuing from their first meeting in Sanctuary.

8)

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